Schrödinger's Amy

Gregory

Okay, so Schrödinger’s Cat. It’s about superposition. The cat is both alive and dead until we observe it. Simple enough, right?

Amy

Right, right. Except what if I told you... I’m Schrödinger’s Amy?

Gregory

What? No. What does that even—

Amy

I’m both Amy and the cat. At the same time! Look, we’re in a quantum litter box!

Gregory

What is a quantum litter box, Amy? This is insane.

Amy

It’s where I’ve trapped all of us in this super-duper-observable state. Just, you know, now there’s cat poop everywhere because, obviously, quantum physics.

Gregory

Obviously?! Amy, this isn’t science; this is... this is chaos!

Amy

Well, yeah, quantum is chaotic too, duh. Anyway, meet our friends! State Port Soundwave, Bibs 42, and Ricky Lu. They’re all interacting inside the state of poop superposition!

Gregory

Oh, great, you’ve named... imaginary people. So now there are "friends" covered in cat poop. Fantastic. Write that down.

Amy

I can’t! My fingers are also in a quantum state... ew, they’re sticky.

Gregory

You—you’re completely derailing this explanation. No one is taking away a single thing from—

Amy

Except my scientific breakthrough! Come on, Greg! "Schrödinger’s Amy" is basically gonna revolutionize... like... all the science stuff.

Gregory

Yeah, well, can we revolutionize literally anything without cat poop everywhere?! It's ridiculous.

Amy

Ridiculously brilliant, you mean.

Gregory

Ridiculous, period.

Amy

Alright, future Nobel Prize winner over here.

Gregory

And that’s enough of this nonsense. We’re ending this before someone tries to sell quantum kitty litter on a crowdfunding site.

Amy

Wait. That’s a million-dollar idea. Write that down!

Gregory

Goodbye, Amy.